Feeling Loved

Five more days in Indianapolis. Holy freaking cow. Seriously. Rationally, I know that I move on Saturday, but emotionally I can't believe that I'm leaving Indy. And my friends. Let's not forget that I'm leaving (most of) my friends.

This past Saturday night some of my favorite women got together for a Girls Night Out in downtown Indianapolis. One of them, a Purdue grad herself, really enjoys my impending Boilermaker status - a little TOO much, I think. We had a great evening of pedicures, shopping, a ride in an Escalade to dinner, fantastic guacamole, dancing at a club, and finally embarrassing the future vet on stage at a local piano bar. All in all too much alcohol was consumed and a fantastic evening was had by all.

I want to note that none of the above are things that I would usually spend money on. (well, except for the fantastic guacamole - we all know where MY priorities lie!) But the evening was so great that I'm left with the nagging feeling that I want to recapture part or all of it on a daily/weekly/monthly basis. I know that's not possible because the best part of the evening was the company - but I have that feeling nonetheless. I couldn't have asked for a better last Saturday night in the city I've called home for 15 years.

And, lest you think I'm getting too sentimental, I'm including a picture of me drinking my very first Boilermaker. (My advice? Don't drink one of these.)

Last week, the boy had to work really REALLY early in the morning. So when I woke up for work as usual, there was no one else in the house. Just me and the dogs. And... you guys... I sorta missed him. And by "sorta" I mean, I was all mopey as I went about the normal morning routine that I've enjoyed for the past three years. Alone. With no boy. I've GOT to shake that off, I know. I'm moving to Lafayette (ALONE!) and things will return to normal. And "normal" can not mean "lonely." But I thought I would mention this, if only to give my friend Jaclyn something to be happy about. (Don't think I don't know you're lurking out there, Jac.)

I get my keys tomorrow night, so the first carload of boxes will make their way up with me tomorrow. I still have a few things to pack, and two large things to get rid of (desktop computer and dining room table) but I think that once those two things are taken care of, I'll feel better about the move. After all, the kitchen is all packed, the living room is all packed, and I'm not packing my clothes. I'm hoping to just transport them on hangers. My friend zlionsfan offered to help drive up a carload of stuff. I was hesitant at first, thinking about his tiny hybrid and his ability to put much stuff in there. But then I realized that his tiny hybrid has the advantage of being entirely dog hair free, so he is now my official clothing mover. Despite the boy's profession of doom and gloom, I think I have this move pretty much under control. Not as under control as my cousin when SHE moved, but as close as a habitual procrastinator can possibly be.

Also? Tyson is still a terrible dog. Only now he's a stoned, senile, and stinky-breath terrible dog. Not going to miss him. Maybe miss the boy, but not his dog. So all is still right with the world.

Ramblings of a Sleep Deprived Mind

First things first - no word on the physics exam. I anticipate I'll get the results on Thursday. Wait, let me re-phrase that. Our professor will give us back our tests on Thursday so as not to awaken the sleeping beast that is Emily's rage and cause her to go postal from the unbearable suspense.

This morning, I was racking my brain for blog fodder and my mind drifted back to the past weekend of bliss. Bliss because I unexpectedly ignored all responsibilities and stress and had a fantastic time. Of course, that weekend led to late nights of homework every night this week, but I think that's an even trade. The weekend was bliss.

It began with a trip to my hometown to pick up Blue and a father/daughter date. After a free movie and satisfying lunch, I planned to meet up with my friend for an evening out....at a BAR!

I was initially conflicted about the evening out. For the drive home (3 hours plus) and to see my dad, I was dressed casually in sneakers and a Colts sweatshirt. This sort of outfit has become my uniform when not at work. I honestly can't remember the last time I put on makeup.... and fixing my hair? Shoot, I haven't even used my hair dryer in MONTHS. Getting up with enough time to get into the office at 7:00am is difficult enough for a morning-hater like me. When I have to decide whether to sleep 10 more minutes, or fix my hair? Sleep wins every time.

But going out to a bar? I mean, how often do I go out? I'm either at work, school, or cuddled up under a blanket at home with a dog. I don't put much stock in appearances anyway, and in those three situations who am I trying to impress?

But going out? With another single female? Ready to have a glass of wine and go OUT?!

Oh, but the effort to get ready. And for what? It's not like I'm trying to pick up men. I know someone who might be upset if that was my goal.

So I did what any female would do. I called the other female going out with me and we discussed how we should dress. Luckily she was as excited about an evening out as I was (apparently neither of us gets out much) and so we decided that high heels were appropriate. Her excitement was contagious, so when I hung up the phone I practically skipped to my room to get ready.

Dude. We were HOTTT!

Which lead us to discuss why women would fix themselves up to look their very best every day. I mean, if you look your best every day, where's the 'wow factor' when you get really dressed up? I waffle on this subject. Sometimes I think it's insecurity that leads women to refuse to leave their house without full makeup. They must not think they're pretty enough otherwise, right? But other times, I think it's insecurity that keeps women from wearing makeup every day. After all, if you're not TRYING to compete with other women, you can't lose, right? What I finally settled on is that neither theory is correct, and it's all about whatever makes you feel comfortable.* I have several friends who look perfectly put together every time I see them, and yet, I'm perfectly comfortable next to them in my tennis shoes because they're comfortable with themselves. And I also know people who are perfectly put together with an edge. I don't know how else to describe it, but I feel uncomfortable in my tennis shoes because I feel like they're measuring up to see how they look in relation to those around them instead of how they feel about themselves. I tend not to like being around those people.

Me personally? I really just don't care enough to put effort into appearance. It's not that important to me. I can appreciate my friends who can dress well (and I would LOVE to have one of them come shopping with me and dress me. Any takers? Please? Your fashion-challenged friend is begging you.) But I love the 'wow factor.' I love being rewarded with compliments when I actually put effort into my appearance. I love the excitement of knowing I look good** and spending an evening doing something I wouldn't normally do.

My friend and I were both giddy with wearing high heels and makeup. As an added bonus, it turned out that we went to high school with the head bartender at the bar we chose. We didn't pick up men, but that wasn't the point. We caught up, talked to random men who approached us, judged the VERY short skirt that made her way around the bar*** and had a great evening.

Haven't worn makeup since.

Women? I would love opinions on this. To wear makeup or not to wear makeup? To dress up or not to dress up? To sneaker or not to sneaker. Those are the questions. Opinions appreciated.

*But I hold on to the caveat that it's a fine line between wearing makeup every day, and eventually getting to the point where you're wearing full makeup to the gym because OH MY GOD you can't be seen in public without MAKEUP!! I worry about women when it gets to that point.

**Reality really doesn't matter much here...it's all about how I feel. I tend to avoid mirrors. I know I look hot, reality does not need to confirm or deny the facts.

***Dude! We could totally see snatch. Well groomed... but still!!

Ask and Ye Shall Receive

So, in a completely unexpected, but totally appreciated gesture, Simply Alisa answered my down-in-the-dumps request for encouragement, and sent me a present.

When I got the present, I was thrilled.

When I opened the present, I was more thrilled.

When I saw that it said XL on the box, I was beyond thrilled. Mega-sized DOTS!!

But apparently the XL refers to the size of the box. Not the size of the DOTS.

Meh. They were delicious anyway. And since DOTS from the East Coast are better than Midwest DOTS, I even branched out and ate the yellow ones. Which means that the only DOTS left in the box in this picture are the green ones.

It really is the little things in life. Thanks Alisa!!

Random Bullet Points

-Did you know that if you pretend that you don't know something that a stupid person does know, it makes them really REALLY happy to tell you all about it? "Really? Iced Tea has caffeine? I had no idea!"

-I am so tired, I'm almost falling asleep at my desk. I can't believe missing sleep from Monday Night Football would still affect me on Wednesday. I even went to bed on time last night.

-My "friends"* involved me in a weight loss challenge. (Based on points for different things, not total weight loss - though weight loss factors in heavily.) I seem to be in the thick of the running (or at least not left in the dust) and I'm floored. FLOORED. Due to time constraints, I get next to no points for exercise. I'm just religious about journaling and drinking water. Which feels like I'm basically doing nothing. And yet, to date I've lost 6 lbs.

-Trust me, you're glad this is the first you've heard of the weight loss challenge. The first week of competition I was filled with great vitriol for the challenge organizer regarding how she was responsible for my lack of sustenance, and how I was obviously going to starve to death in addition to having to pee every 10 seconds until blissful death took me away.

-Internet drama is exponentially better than soap operas, but still doesn't approach the level of genius that is Gossip Girl.

-I heart Dooce.

-I had an outpouring of hatred for Biggest Loser last night, though ultimately I still enjoy the show. These people are losing 28lbs in two weeks. I call bullshit. The boy tried to pacify me with the fact that those people have a lot (LOT) more fat to lose than I do, but diet irrationality knows no bounds. I only know that it's been a bitch to lose 6 lbs, and I'm super jealous.

-Salmon is diet superfood.

-According to my BMI, I am no longer obese.** Now I'm just overweight. I still haven't changed the first two numbers on my weight, though, so I'm not sure how I feel about that formality change. Check back with me next week.

-Since I do not have one, I totally want to get on zlionfan's Wii and have it tell me how awesome I am for losing weight.

-That last bullet point just cracked me up.

*In quotes because obviously no "real" friend would deprive me of eating. ahem. They forced me. Bound and gagged me. I am an innocent (and hungry) bystander in this insanity.

**According to my BMI, people. I never believed that. I happen to think I just have heavy bones.

Okay...maybe it was hormones

I just read this, and I'm tearing up at my desk. My boss keeps asking me what's wrong, and I can't exactly tell him that I was reading the best of Craigslist on the sly when I should have been giving the bill paying my complete attention. Nor can I explain to him that I was looking for the good laugh that Craigslist is reliable in providing me (see: this) and instead found a touching story that is making my nose turn Rudolph red, and my eyes puff up like I haven't slept in weeks. (I am not a pretty crier btw.)

So instead I'm just telling him that it's allergies. We'll keep this between us, okay?

Vacation blog coming. Just hold your horses. I'm not known for recovering from non-routine activities very quickly.

Work to Live

So, this work thing has been interfering with my blogging. I have informed my boss that this can not continue, but he seems not to care.

Seriously, work has been a madhouse for the last week or so. A new guy has been brought on board, and in an office of three, this causes quite a stir. Can't. Wait. Until. Things. Settle. Down.

As a result, I have had zero time for email checking or blog reading or (most importantly) blog posting. Sorry for anyone I've neglected. I hope to get back to my regularly scheduled programming soon. In the meantime, here are some snippets.

- I managed to make myself look like a complete idiot while walking Casey on Saturday. It was "Bike Day" at Crown Hill, so there were cyclists everywhere. Still, I walk in an older/rarely visited portion of the cemetery, so I let Casey off-leash anyway. I saw a cyclist approaching at a reasonable speed, so I wasn't concerned as I went to corral Casey. When the cyclist was about 50 feet away, she yelled "Does she know what a bicycle is?"

My mind was in approximately a million places at once as I enjoyed my newest playlist, pushed my walk to get it done in under an hour so I wasn't late to meet my friend, and keeping track of Casey so she didn't get in the way of the cyclist. As a result, the only thing that I could think to respond to the woman was, "Um, she's a dog?"

The lady had to stop her bike because she was laughing so hard. After some discussion, we determined that the lady was just asking whether or not Casey was familiar with bikes and knew not to get in the way. I explained that yes, Casey is recently familiar with bikes, but that this was no guarantee that she would stay out of her way, which is why I was herding her over to my side as the cyclist approached. The still-chuckling woman rode off, and I felt like the world's biggest idiot.

- I saw my first horse-show this past weekend. The son of one of my friends from high school was a partipant. It was very cool and I was overall very impressed. I didn't actually realize how tentative I would be around horses, though. My friend said, "Wait a sec, aren't you wanting to become a vet?!" Um, yes. But I never said I wanted to be a large animal vet. Maybe it's because of my short stature, but horses are GIGANTIC! I love horses....I'm just not sure I want to be that close to them. At least not within kicking or stomping distance.

- I did absolutely nothing on Sunday and it felt FABULOUS!

- I have had my bike helmet for over a week now and haven't yet had a chance to use it. I missed out on my bike marathon for the horse show, which was worth it, but I'm still bummed. I need to find time to get back on my bike.

- Drink your milk, kids. I started eating cereal for breakfast every day, and I'm astounded by the changes in my body by the mere addition of daily milk. (not the least of which are fingernails that are longer than I've ever before had them.)

- Unless it's raining, I'm taking the camera on my walk with Casey tonight. I figure it's been long enough since my last photo-blog, and there are some very pretty views at Crown Hill that I'm sure even I can capture with my point and shoot. What I NEED to do is get Ann to go on my walk with me after Baby Boo arrives. But for now, you'll have to make do with my pictures.

- I have a reunion this weekend in Chicago. I'm meeting up with some people that I studied abroad with in Costa Rica. Ten years ago. I hate how old that makes me feel, but I'm looking forward to the fun time that is certain to be had.

Customer Retention

I went on a quick grocery shopping excursion the week before last because I could no longer scrounge up any sort of meal from the items left in my kitchen. (Parmesan Cheese, pepperoni, soy sauce, and something that used to be chicken.) I had just gotten out of class, and was making a quick run before heading home to take care of Casey...because, um, dog food was something else I needed, and if I didn't buy some, there was going to be no "taking care of Casey" just a "starving and angry dog."

I was in a really good mood after having received my latest physics test score (which was a 97% in case I didn't already tell you!!!) but otherwise, the only things on my mind were getting what I needed and getting home. When I got to the checkout counter, I began putting my items on the conveyor belt and was immediately amused by how the items screamed out "lives alone!" Tuna helper, tuna fish, wine, skinny cows, dog food. Hmmm...if that doesn't scream single woman, I'm not sure what does.

So I was smiling to myself as I lifted the 25lb bag of dog food onto the conveyor belt and when I glanced at the cashier, I was somewhat startled to make immediate eye contact.

< Tangent > I always try to make eye contact with people when I'm speaking with them, whether they be the Starbucks barista, the pizza delivery guy or the checkout guy at Safeway. My rule is at least a good second of eye contact and a smile. It's actually pretty difficult to catch and maintain eye contact with strangers. You should try it sometime. It's like we've become a society of no eye contact. I miss it. I think it makes you feel more connected to whoever you're talking to and these days, who doesn't want to feel connected? < /Tangent >

He was a young man, probably in his late teens, but in my eyes he looked approximately twelve years old. He had really pretty eyes, and as he watched me heave the dog food onto the conveyor, they widened slightly.

"Wow. You're really strong."

I got embarrassed and looked down. "Yeah, well, I've had a lot of practice." When I glanced up again, he was still looking straight at me, and at that moment I could see him decide to say something. I braced myself for some comment about the "great night" he could see that I had planned based on my purchases.

"You look like J-Lo. Has anyone ever told you that before?"

My immediate thoughts went something like this: Do not laugh. DO NOT LAUGH. That was a COMPLIMENT. Nevermind that it has no basis in reality. It probably took a lot of courage for him to say that. Don't you even smirk! Just say something non-committal and move on. Do NOT LAUGH AT THIS LITTLE BOY!

I bit the inside of my cheek for what felt like five seconds, swallowed back my laughter and said, "Well, thank you. I don't think I've ever heard that before."

"Well you do. You know who she is, don't you?"

"Oh, I know who she is."

As he handed me my receipt he said, "Can I have your autograph?"

For a brief moment I was tempted to sign 'Jennifer Lopez' but refrained at the last second. I silently returned the receipt, took my bags and with one last smile, I headed out to my car.

Where I dissolved into tears of laughter.

I immediately called my father, "Hey dad, do you want to hear something hilarious?" and proceeded to tell him what had just happened. He laughed, and mentioned that between that compliment and my test grade, it had turned out to be a pretty good evening for me.

"It really has. But dad, do you want to know the best part? From where the boy was standing behind the checkout counter, he couldn't see my butt! He wasn't saying I look like J-Lo because of my behind. He actually thought I looked like Jennifer Lopez!"

And then I laughed again. Because I was flattered. Truly. But in reality? No freaking way kid. Thanks for making an old lady's night.

Wiped. Out.

Plenty going on in the life of Emily right now. Most of it heavy and emotional, so I'll stick to the lighter fun topics. They're easier to write about.

I went home last weekend for Easter to see that Blue is settling into his new home nicely. I think part of him still misses me, since he LEPT off the couch when he saw me and pretty much didn't leave my side. But he's also got his routine at my parent's house where he watches movies with them and puts his head on my mom's lap. It's the cutest thing. They love him. He loves them. And after seeing the stark contrast between Blue and Casey, my parents have once again determined that Casey is not allowed in their house.*

On the homefront, I can't TELL you how different it is. Both the boy and I have commented that we miss Blue - a LOT. But on the other hand, Casey is suddenly an absolute angel. With no one to compete with, she's back to "remembering" how to behave. Even when zlionsfan came over, Casey didn't jump on him once. (And if you ask him, before the subtraction of Blue the dogs would practically pull him down like a pack of wolves when he entered the door.) It was like an Easter miracle. Other benefits to the one-dog household include being able to put your shoes on the floor without fear that they will be eaten, and not having to worry about gigantic drool spots appearing on your jeans. And have I mentioned that Casey is an angel now? Because she is. Seriously. It's completely unexpected and appreciated.** This whole thing has opened up an entirely new range of emotions for me. One the one hand - so happy that my parents love Blue and that he's got such a good home. On the other hand - I miss my buddy. One the one hand - so proud that I placed this dog in the perfect home and that Casey is so much better as an "only dog." On the other hand - I miss my buddy. It's definitely been a learning experience.

A bright spot in my life is the addition of "new" electronics. Now, since I'm a poor student, I have accepted that new electronics are just a part of my life that I have to do without until I graduate and become a DVM.*** But then I realized that I have this friend who likes to upgrade HIS electronics, and is willing to sell his old electronics at a below-market-Emily-feels-like-she's-ripping-him-off price. (I have other friends who also know the joy of "inheriting" old electronics. Best. Thing. Ever.) I guess I should just be glad that he let me buy this one instead of gifting old electronics as has happened in the past. So, internet, please meet my "new-to-me" laptop. This isn't the best picture, since it doesn't show the pretty pretty blue color that is the top of my laptop, but it'll do. It's pretty pretty pretty and probably hasn't left my sight since I got it. It also has a wireless card (did I say that right?) so I can surf online at school. And, apparently, at home since it picked up a wireless network in my living room that is not password protected. It asked me if I wanted to connect. Um, yes please. I wonder if I should feel guilty about this?

I would also like to note that this laptop has confirmed to me one of the fundamental differences between men and women. My first impression of the laptop was the pretty blue color. The first comment from my brother and my boss was, "The screen is HUGE! How big is that anyway?"

In other news, there was yet another physics test last night that I feel reasonably confident about.***** That was the day after my second chemistry formal report was due, so I'm ready for my glass of wine tonight. I would normally want to pair that wine with some meat and cheese, but I guess that since it's spring, and since I told certain guilt inducing people that I would join in, I should start watching what I eat. (she says grudgingly.) Sigh. It's time for the yearly weight loss struggle to begin. Maybe this year I'll keep it off. (And maybe I'll be elected president of my own country too.)

Finally, I directed my parents to watch the fabulous video that I posted last week. (Have you watched it yet? You should watch it. Seriously. Go. Now. I'll wait....) When in church for Easter (I know, right?) I saw a little girl wearing a fabulous yellow shirt paired with a beautiful sparkly turquoise scarf. I loved the outfit, and when I got a chance, I leaned forward and told her so. My mother watched this exhange, then leaned over to me, pantomimed stamping her hand and said, "Validated." That one comment made my day.

*What they really mean is that I have to be present at all times that Casey is in their house. No more leaving her under their supervision because things have a way of, um, getting broken.

**My father said it's because she thinks I took Blue off and killed him or something. So she behaves because she's afraid the same fate will happen to her if she's not careful. You know what? If that's what it is, I'm still grateful. She's being SO good.

***Note the confidence. It's a new thing I'm trying.****

****It's taking all of my willpower not to delete that sentence and put in something that's a bit more, um, open to other possibilities.

*****The lack of crowing about my previous test indicates that perhaps I did not perform as well as I would have liked. I'm hoping to rectify that with this exam.

Validation

I was introduced to this video through a sort of "study group" that I'm in. We are discussing the message in this video. I love it. Love it love it love it. It's about 17 minutes long, so make sure you have time to watch the entire thing. It is so worth it.

Kudos!

Two posts in one day! I know. It's extraordinary. But then again, what just happened is so awesome that I want to make sure the company gets the proper good publicity...or at least all the good publicity that I can offer.

I had a nasty surprise at the end of November when I went to pay my cell bill for October. Since the car accident made me freak out I cried on the phone to my parents, my friends, complete strangers... And on top of that, I had to talk to the insurance company several times, not to mention the phone calls to lawyers... In all, I incurred $184.57 in overage fees on my cell plan. It was fabulous. My already tight budget was very upset with me.

I would have thought that I had no alternatives, and that sucks. But thanks to Candy's post earlier this year, I called AT&T and explained what had happened.

They waived ALL of the overage costs.

Now, granted, I've been a customer of AT&T for years. And when I incur overages that are completely my fault (ahem, text messages, ahem) I pay with no complaints. But since these charges were under extenuating circumstances, I thought that I would at least explain myself and see if anything could be done. Even if they had reduced the overages by half, I would have been happy.

I'm so grateful for both their assistance and Candy's advice to speak up. AT&T has a loyal customer in me for at least another contract term (and I even upgraded to the next text message package.)

Solar Powered

We had a couple of absolutely beautiful days mid-week this week, and I was going to write a post with the title above because I had so much energy and was in such a good mood!!!

And then today came with the rain, and it became even more apparent that I am most definitely solar powered. Rain sucks. Cloudy sucks. Can this day just hurry up and be over, please? Kthxbai.

This morning, I was doing my insubordinate surf-favorite-blogs-instead-of-starting-work-right-away-because-I-may-work-for-you-but-I-don't-have-to-be-happy-to-be-here thing (which only happens on days like today...promise!) and I found this post from one of my favorite bloggers. Um, that may be fundamentally her, but it's also an almost spot on perfect description of me. And since she said it better than I ever could, I'll just link to her blog and do the internet equivalent of "Yeah. What she said."

This weekend looks to be decent weather, and I'm so glad. I'm pretty against taking the dogs to daycare during the summer when I am perfectly capable of going on walks with them and wearing them out for free. However, this does require less sleeping and a general exercise of that "willpower" thing that, to be honest, has been pretty MIA lately. When it rains my plans are foiled (though I will admit that I enjoy the extra sleep in the mornings) and the dogs are nutso in the evening. So my grand aspirations for this long weekend are A) hike with the dogs, B) begin packing for the big move and C) go see Emily's most anticipated movie of the summer.

I hope everyone has a great Memorial Day weekend and it's as relaxing as I hope mine is.

iPod magic

Okay, so putting your iPod on shuffle and having it dig up a song you love but have totally forgotten (BNL - When I Fall) is the best kind of pick-me-up ever.